How long will this era of darkness last?

Will I ever live up to my potential?

How do I find peace? Where do I find rest?

Does anything I do matter?

If I were to disappear, who would come looking for me?

Would anyone give the same kindness to me I do to them?

Will I ever leave a mark on this world?

Do I matter?

It’s funny how well I’m able to suppress this dark and melancholic side of me. In my Public Speech course I took, I remember receiving so many comments on how I’m “so full of passion and positive energy,” even though sometimes I feel the exact opposite – a dead man walking and as cold as ice. Perhaps I put on this persona of confidence and charisma to endure and cope with the hardships I face. A way to distract myself from the frustration and sorrow that dwells within my soul.

How long, I wonder, can I keep this persona alive?

Only God and the wind know for sure.